I am feeling like I have told this recap a million times in the last week, so maybe this will be one last time 😉 I’ve been back in Alaska since last Tuesday night. It has taken this long to find the time to sit down and write because I was traveling for work Wednesday and Thursday, and then felt like Friday was a catch up day in a lot of other aspects of my life. Anyway, I’m here now and I’ll start from where I left off after my last post.

I had to do some last minute weight cutting the morning of meet day. At 6 AM (one hour before weigh-ins), I was 0.6-lbs over.. Nothing 30 minutes of jumping jacks bundled up in the hotel bathroom and spitting with Jolly Ranchers couldn’t fix, though. By the time I weighed in, I was about a pound under weight. For the calm, cool, and collective morning-of weight cutting, I have my brother to thank. Honestly, I had fun with it all because I was completely confident that I was going to get down to 158.7-lbs (72-kg) thanks to my brother. He is the first person I go to for a voice of reason when I need some grounding, and his calm demeanor was just what I needed in that situation.

I’m not going to repeat the numbers I lifted again, those are listed in my last post. What I will talk about is peeing. Sounds weird, I know, and I’ve gotten some hilarious reactions the last week telling this story.. Last weekend going into the Deadlift portion of Raw Nationals, I was sitting pretty in 2nd place overall. My opening Deadlift at 313-lbs was smooth, but as I walked back to the chair I was sitting in, I realized I kind of had to pee. Not a full-bladder kind of pee, but had a little sensation, and I didn’t think I had enough time to hit the bathroom before my 2nd attempt (336-lbs).. So I ignored it. Note to self: that was the WRONG choice. It was my turn for Deadlift #2 and I confidently marched out to the platform, tightened up my belt, went through my routine set-up, and as soon as I put tension on the bar I felt it coming. I pulled the bar to my knees before giving in to the pee that was streaming down my leg (sorry for being graphic) and put the bar back down. I think I yelled a profanity before turning around to my amazing handler/coach, “I just PISSED myself!” were my words. She knew, and very calmly she told me it was okay and to hit the bathroom, that I would get 336 on my 3rd attempt. Part of me (maybe my ego) didn’t want to hear that – I knew I was capable of lifting more – but I also know that my coaches know best and in situations like that, I need to trust their judgement. In a high-energy and emotional moment like that, it would be really easy for me to make a stupid decision that might cost me more in the end.. So it was better to play it safe. My 3rd deadlift was easier than I think a 3rd deadlift should be in a competition, but that’s okay.. It fuels my fire.

After last weekend, I made a pretty big decision. I’ve already committed to a late-October CrossFit competition here in Anchorage that I’m going to spend the next few months training for. But after that, I’m going to devote 100% of my time to training for the Arnold in late-February. Even though I didn’t do as well as I would have hoped at Nationals, I felt like I was totally in my element and that it was just where I needed to be, so I’m going to ride this wave and see where it takes me. It also dawned on me that I will only be in the Junior category until March 22nd of 2014, so the Arnold is going to be my last opportunity to chip my American Junior records if I still have them by then, or to reclaim them if not.

That means that for the Open next year (March-April most likely), I’ll be in powerlifting shape and not really in CrossFit shape, but I’m going to wing it. CrossFit Fairbanks is hosting a powerlifting competition on September 14 that I’m going to participate in, as well, to get more meet exposure before the Arnold.

I can’t even begin to thank my family enough for their unwavering support. I was a total b*tch sometimes with the stress, hunger, and nerves leading up to Nationals, but they stood by me faithfully. Another couple of trusty voices of reason in my life are my guardian angel, Rob, and my coach, Matt. I feel like I can ask them about anything and I’ll get a sound explanation, no matter how ridiculous. They are a couple of my biggest fans and I would have never, ever, EVER would have even dreamt of Nationals without their guidance. I also met some really great people.

I am so very excited to continue this journey.

Here is a video of my 3rd deadlift at 336-pounds